Monthly Newsletter
The Bonds We Build
Courtesy of:
Orly Katz, Professional Relationships and Couple Counselor
June 19, 2018
“Every success story is a tale of constant adaptation, revision and change”
—Richard Branson
Too much cell phone? Really?
Megan and Ron are a couple in their mid-30s with 2 young children. They both hold high demanding jobs and are determined to find the magic balance between home, work and alone time. They both see the use of cell phones as the culprit that takes away their home time from them and tips the delicate balance in favor of work.

They came to my office blaming each other for their excessive cell phone use. “ During dinner his phone is right there ,” Megan claimed. “ He looks at it every few minutes. You do not pay attention to us even though we agreed not to use the phone. “

“Me? “ He was ready with a quick answer. “ You answer every buzz even if it is only a text and you are telling me not to? You are so controlling!!!”

So what happened here? 

Clearly, they did not listen to each other’s needs. Megan’s need is to have quality home time with Ron. She wants an engaged husband who gives the family his undivided attention during meal time. Ron, on his end, feels as though Megan imposes some rules on him. Rules that he doesn’t agree with. He views it as a threat to his independence.

They both feel blamed and accused through no fault of their own.

In our meetings they listened to each other and allowed each other to express their underlying needs. Megan confessed that she needs him and Ron admitted he needs to make the decisions sometimes. We looked at different options that will make the ground rules for a positive environment and will address both needs. Megan and Ron decided that both will answer the phone during meal time only if it rings. They will alert each other that they only check if it is important and will be right back. Both agreed to avoid texts during family meals.

They would re-evaluate their agreement and make changes periodically.

What is your experience with phone use? How did you address it?

I would love to hear from you. Please contact me at and I will incorporate your reply in my next newsletter.

Join me on Facebook Live on Sunday
July 1st at 11:00am for a discussion about this topic.
On Personal Growth:  Midlife anxiety is linked to dementia
in old age.
A review of four studies that included over 28,000 people showed that there is a correlation between moderate to severe anxiety in midlife and dementia 10 years later.

Authors of the review explain that abnormal stress response, may speed up brain cell aging and degenerative changes in the central nervous system, which increase vulnerability to dementia.

They concluded that, “non-pharmacological therapies, including talking therapies and mindfulness-based interventions and meditation practices, that are known to reduce anxiety in midlife, could have a risk reducing effect.”

BMJ open, April 2018
On Relationships:  Psychological detachment from work stress affects quality of romantic interactions.
Among a sample of 106 dual- earner, committed couples researchers found that when partners’ jobs had not occupied them during the evenings, couples experienced higher quality of romantic interactions.

The researchers explained that the ability to detach from work affected partners and quality of time together. When occupied and stressed about work, partners spent less time together, perceived each other as less available and romantic relationship were compromised.

Researchers suggest that positive activities and partners’ support might distract from job related thoughts, reduce impact of stress and assist in better detachment from work and better relationships.

Journal of Happiness Studies, September 2017
On New Parents’ Relationships:  Early Romantic Relationships linked with improved child behavior 8 years later  
Results of a study of 1318 couples across 8 years revealed that mothers’ and fathers’ early relationship quality predicted their own parental engagements 2 years into the future.
Researchers add that mothers’ more than fathers’ parental behaviors mediated relationship quality and their children’s positive outcome.

In conclusion researches suggest that clinicians and parent educators include relationship enhancement programs for the benefit of parents and their children.

Journal of Family Issues, March 2014
Some of these summaries have been sourced from a third party syndicated feed, agencies. We accept no responsibility or liability for its dependability, trustworthiness, reliability and data of the text. We reserve the sole right to alter, delete or remove (without notice) the content in its absolute discretion for any reason whatsoever.
NEW Upcoming Events:

New mothers’ circle support group . This is a FREE ongoing support group for new mothers up to 3 months postpartum. It will be on the first and third Mondays of the each month from 11:00am-12:30pm. You are welcome to bring your baby with you, feel free to nurse at the meeting.

Presentation on new parents’ relationship during Transition to parenthood. It is a onetime FREE presentation, same one on the 2 nd Monday of each month, 6:30-8:00pm. Designed for expecting couples or new parents.

Presentation on couple relationship. It is a onetime FREE event and same presentation will take place on every 4 th Monday of the month 6:30-8:00pm. It is open primarily to committed couples in long term relationships.

For more details about these events please click here: 

Recommended Book of the Month:
13 Things That Mentally Strong People Don’t Do,
By Amy Morin

Recommended Activity of the Month:
Pay attention to something positive that happened to you today. Be it, someone was nice to you this morning, something went your way easily, traffic was light or such. Write it down and share with your partner in the evening. Try it for a week and evaluate!
Let us know how it went.

Check Out Our Blogs ( )
Name | Company | Phone | Fax | Email | Website