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The Canton's Adoption Story
How do you tell a 14-year story? I look at our boys, ages 4 and 5 playing baseball in the backyard and realize a year ago today they moved in permanently. It feels like yesterday, and it feels like forever. I guess I’ll start at the beginning.
In 2009 I had been married for 4 years and relocated with my husband to Texas. We had just started talking about kids and formulating a plan when I went on a mission trip to Honduras with my church. I completely fell in love with the kids there; their spirit, their playfulness, their hope and contentment. On the last day of the trip our team met a couple at the hotel who had come to bring their adopted son home and a tiny seed was planted: what about adoption? What about a child who didn’t look like me, who wasn’t necessarily a baby and maybe didn’t even speak my language? I talked to my husband when I got home and he was cautiously interested. So the next year we went back on another mission trip and he got to see for himself the people, the kids, and feel the possibility of parenting an adopted child. After that trip he was 100% on board. We signed up with an agency and started the process…then Honduras as a country closed to American adoption.
We decided to remain open to finding our kids wherever they may be. First a distant cousin contacted us with kids in care that needed a home but that fell through. Then we found out I had cancer and 6 months of treatment later, we had nothing left in the adoption account and very little energy or hope to move forward. Nothing was easy; nothing went as we expected. Before long it had been 8 years with what felt like NO forward momentum.
I heard through the grapevine that Honduras may be reopening and so with more cautious enthusiasm we contacted a few agencies. A few months later we were in Tegucigalpa introducing Nightlight to our contacts there as they had decided to consider opening a Honduras program! We were helping open doors…but it just didn’t work out for us. We really felt led…until we didn’t. I don’t know how to describe it other than a door shut then a wall was built. Working on that project with Nightlight was amazing and I have loved watching families be successful with their Honduran adoptions. Since that trip in 2017, Nightlight has assisted adoptive families bring home 18 children through the Honduras adoption program. God used our adoption journey to help other children and families, and for that I am grateful.
After a period of prayer and honestly confusion we had a homestudy done and took classes with CPS as an adopt only family. And we waited. And were called for a few sets of kids just to make it to top two and not be chosen. We had a friend who took in two kids that turned into a CPS case. CPS asked us if we wanted to adopt, and we became respite for them. A year later CPS then decided on 5th cousins of the children as the adoptive placement instead. That was the closest we had ever come to being parents and we really had to grieve the loss of the family we were so close to having.
In October 2019 a Facebook message came though on my phone: “Hi. We have a mutual friend. We have foster kids that may be needing a home. They mentioned you might be looking for kids…” I’ll be honest – I was EXHAUSTED. Emotionally, and even financially. I told her I needed a little time. But I couldn’t stop thinking about the message. Two little boys, ages 1 ½ and 2 ½. They would be legally free in just 4 months. I told her we would like to be respite and meet them. I invited her to come to a Christmas party my husband’s company throws every year. I waited for them to walk through that door the way you wait for a blind date: more trepidation than excitement. Then there they were and…they were my kids. I knew. I thought I’d known before, but this was different. Thanks to COVID their case got delayed and delayed and a few bumps thrown in but we officially became The Cantons in October of 2022. And it was worth every year and every hard goodbye. As we say every night before bed, we are Team Canton: together forever, no matter what.
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