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LoveNote 2
Couples' Newsletter
May 2016
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Sherman and I have recently presented
intimacy workshops at a few churches and events. We've been surprised that quite a few women have had the courage to ask, "what do you do when you try to hug or kiss your husband and he won't hug or kiss you back?" Having had this question asked of me during one-on-one conversations, I thought I knew the answer and each time, I gave the answer that I always give, "you just keep trying it, just keep doing it". Then, one day I was talking to someone and sharing the concern I have that so many people are married to "mean" people. I shared the question that we'd been asked and my answer and the person I was talking to said to me, "I don't know if this is an area you can counsel in, you're not married to an ornery, unaffectionate person. You say, "keep trying", but you don't know what it does to a person's spirit to try day after day to kiss and hug someone who will not reciprocate affection". Wow! I don't. I was focused on my belief that love heals and love covers a multitude of sins. Again, all of our presentations have been Christian-focused, in churches or at least with "church people". Who 'in Christ' won't hug his wife? Not loving your spouse misrepresents our Savior. I know we all are a work in progress, but... Remind your spouse that it says in
1 John 4:20 (NIV), "Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister
is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen,
cannot love God, whom they have not seen."
No, we can't empathize with the situation, but we can sympathize and share with you that we recently saw a Facebook posting via
Mend Our Marriage, about a young lady who was married to a man who didn't want her. God has restored her marriage and she has written a book about it,
Motivated to Love,
www.motivated2love.com. And, we don't usually promote books or presentations that we haven't read or experienced ourselves, but we're going to go out on a limb and suggest that anyone who is experiencing this problem in their marriage, go to Amanda Taylor's website and listen to her video and purchase her book.
There is hope! Love does heal hearts. Love still covers a multitude of sins.
Some would say that the man who is emotionally isolated is cheating. Well, this is possible, but not always the case. We think that more times than not, people are 1) suffering with
self-hatred that has led to
depression or some type of
mental disorder, 2)
never learned how to communicate their feelings and are
angry and
resentful about something (i.e. spouse's weight gain, too much money being spent, house not clean, spouse doing better in her career than he is doing in his career, life not going the way he planned), or 3) as a couple you have had a sexual relationship based on performance and now he is having health issues that may impede performance and you
haven't spent time building an intimate relationship that doesn't include intercourse, so he is embarrassed and angry. But, it's never too late to start. "
Jesus looked at them and said, "with man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible" (Matthew 19:26, NIV). We can't just say scripture, we've got to pray it and continue to "just keep trying" to make it what we (and God) would have it to be.
If you have fallen out of love with your spouse or think your spouse has fallen out of love with you, please read
Revelation 2:4-5,
Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.".
Please see this link regarding how you can fall in love again,
http://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/troubled-marriage/saving-a-marriage/can-you-fall-in-love-again-with-your-spouse . Remember that which is good; think positive; repent of whatever has caused you to fall out of love; and do the things you did at first...when you fell in love.
Love, Peace, and Happiness,
Sherman and Paula Newman
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LoveNotes...songs to listen to ....
- Keep You In Mind-Guordan Banks
- Exceptional- Baby Face (our new favorite:)
- You Don't Know-Tank featuring Wale
- Permission- Ro James
- Fall for You- Leela James
- A Couple of Forevers- Chrisette Michele
- Everything to Me- Monica
- Forever, For Always, For Love- Lalah Hathaway
- Betcha By Golly Wow- Maysa
- I Can't Help It- Esperanza Spalding
Romantic Getaways (We've tried these and we love them. Those of you who know us, know we are hotel connoisseurs:)- Enjoy your summer!
- Fairmont Sonoma Mission Inn and Spa- Sonoma, CA (with daily trips to San Francisco), http://www.fairmont.com/sonoma/
- El Conquistador Resort, A Waldorf Astoria Resort in Puerto Rico, http://www.elconresort.com/
- The Palms Hotel and Spa Miami Beach, FL, http://www.thepalmshotel.com/explore/
- Grand Luxxe Riviera Maya in Playa del Carmen, Mexico- http://www.vidanta.com/es/resort-hotels/grand-luxxe;jsessionid=C2D2514AE22B851AC91713FE30D4CBFD
- Marriott Grande Dunes in Myrtle Beach, SC- http://www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/myrgd-myrtle-beach-marriott-resort-and-spa-at-grande-dunes/
- The Mansion on Forsyth Park in Savannah, GA- http://www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/savad-mansion-on-forsyth-park-autograph-collection/
- Grand Bohemian Hotel in Asheville, NC- https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=grand%20bohemian%20hotel%20asheville
- Atlantis Paradise Island, Bahamas- http://www.atlantisbahamas.com/rooms/thereefatlantis?utm_source=google&utm_medium=local&utm_campaign=GMB
- The Mayflower Hotel in Washington, DC- http://www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/wasak-the-mayflower-hotel-autograph-collection/
- The Ritz Carlton Orlando Grande Lakes in Orlando, FL- http://www.ritzcarlton.com/en/hotels/florida/orlando
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Scripture to Ponder
- Ezekiel 36:26

- Matthew 11: 28-29
- Philippians 4:6
- 1 John 4:4
- Romans 8:37
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Date Ideas
- Thursday, May 19th at 7:00 p.m.- Jam Session with Brian Miller, Free, at the Beyu Caffe, www.beyucaffe.com
- Thursday, May 19th at 8:00 p.m.- An Evening with Aretha Franklin at the DPAC, www.dpacnc.com
- Friday, May 20th at 8:00 p.m.- Dee Lucas- New CD Release Show, $8.00, at the Beyu Caffe
- Saturday, May 21st at 8:00 p.m.- Ti Harmon, $8.00, at the Beyu Caffe
- Thursday, May 26th - Sunday, May 29th - Bill Bellamy (see showtimes at www.goodnightscomedy.com) at Charlie Goodnights, 861 W. Morgan Street, Raleigh, NC 27603
- Friday, May 27th at 8:00 p.m.- Al Strong, at the Beyu Caffe
- Saturday, May 28th at 9:00 p.m.- 9th Wonder, The Art of Cool and The Pour House ( www.thepourhousemusichall.com) present Caramel City featuring Divinity Roxx, Rahbi, and Khrysis at The Pour House (224 South Blount Street, Raleigh, NC 27601)
- Friday, June 3rd- Ms. Mary and the Boys at The Barn Dinner Theatre (see website for showtimes), www.barndinner.com
- Saturday, June 4th at 7:30 p.m.- Kirk Franklin at the DPAC
- Sunday, June 5th at 7:00 p.m.- Journey and the Doobie Brothers at Coastal Credit Union Music Park at Walnut Creek, 3801 Rock Quarry Road, Raleigh, NC 27610
- Tuesday, June 7th - June 18th - Riverdance at DPAC
- Thursday, June 9th at 8:00 p.m.- Chris Botti at the Carolina Theatre, www.carolinatheatre.org
- Thursday, June 9th - June 11th - Faizon Love at Charlie Goodnights (see website for showtimes)
- Friday, June 10th at 8:00 p.m.- R. Kelly: The Buffet Tour 2016 at the Greensboro Coliseum Complex, 1921 W. Gates City Boulevard, Greensboro, NC 27403
- Thursday, June 16th - June 18th at 7:00 p.m.- Pilobolus Dance Company at DPAC
- Saturday, June 18th at 7:30 p.m.- Ringo Starr at Koka Booth Amphitheatre at Regency Park, www.boothamphitheatre.com
- Tuesday, June 21st- - July 1st at 7:00 p.m.- UniverSoul Circus in the Greensboro Coliseum Parking Lot
- Friday, June 24th at 8:00 p.m.- New Edition at the Greensboro Coliseum Complex
- Saturday, June 25th at 8:00 p.m.- TORUK- The First Flight at PNC Arena, www.thepncarena.com
- Saturday, July 7th at 7:30 p.m.- Cameo at the Red Hat Amphitheater
- Thursday, July 14th - July 16th - Ms. Pat at Charlie Goodnights (see website for showtimes)
- Saturday, July 23rd at 7:00 p.m.- Kool & The Gang at Coastal Credit Union Music Park at Walnut Creek
- Tuesday, July 26th at 7:00 p.m.- Merry Jane Presents Snoop Dogg (with Wiz Khalifa, Jhene Aiko, etc.) at Coastal Credit Union Music Park at Walnut Creek
- Tuesday, July 26th - August 7th at 7:30 p.m.- Mary Poppins at Duke Energy Center for Performing Arts, www.dukeenergycenterraleigh.com, 2 E. South Street, Raleigh, NC 27610
- Friday, July 29th at 8:00 p.m.- Maxwell (with Fantasia and Ro James) at the Red Hat Amphitheater, 500 S. McDowell Street, Raleigh, NC 27601
- Thursday, July 29th - July 31st - Lil Duval at Charlie Goodnights (see website for showtimes)
- Saturday, July 30th at 7:30 p.m.- Todrick Hall: Straight Outta Oz at the Duke Energy Center for Performing Arts
- Thursday, August 11th - August 14th - Deray Davis at Charlie Goodnights (see website for showtimes)
- Thursday, August 18th - August 21st - Charlie Murphy at Charlie Goodnights (see website for showtimes)
- Tuesday, August 23rd at 7:00 p.m.- Drake: Summer Sixteen Tour at Greensboro Coliseum Complex
Other Things to Do:
- Cheers n Paint, www.cheersnpaint.com - take snacks and beverages and have a party while painting, 107 Edinburgh Drive, Suite 115, Cary, NC 27511; approximately $30 per person
- Capital City Steppers- Chicago Stepping Classes almost every Sunday
- May 22nd - A Step to Gold Ballroom (in Pleasant Valley Promenade in Raleigh; 6278 Glenwood Avenue #200, Raleigh, NC 27612), 3-5 p.m., $10 per person/$20 per couple
- May 29th - A Step to Gold Ballroom (in Pleasant Valley Promenade in Raleigh), 3-5 p.m., $10 per person/$20 per couple
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Contact Information Sherman and Paula Newman, 919-730-1107 or lovenote2@hotmail.com |
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