THE MAGIC OF MEDIATION How to Find, Feed, and Foment It From Neutrality to Omni-Partiality, and Transformation to Transcendence

Anyone who has mediated even a few disputes is likely to have experienced the magic of mediation, and would very much like to do so again. But if asked where this magic came from, how it happened, what it consisted of, and how they might replicate it, most would be hard pressed to answer.  Magic happens not only because of what we do, but who we are; in spite of everything the parties have said and done to each other, all their anguish and pain and trauma and loss, all their failed efforts and hopelessness. Why? Because we, their mediators, know, in our minds and hearts that magic is possible, and are ready to step into their hatred and fear and darkness and uncertainty, to search for it there.  In mediation, we allow ourselves, for a moment, to become the magic they are seeking, merely because they do not yet understand that the magic is already inside and between them; that they can become magicians and learn how to turn the lead of conflict into the gold of resolution.  We do so--not as “neutrals,” who are on no one’s side--but as “omni-partial,” and on everyone’s side – not factually, but as human beings with diverse experiences, ideas, emotions, and interests. Neutrality is a response to either/or, for or against, victory or loss, zero-sum, digital attitudes toward justice, based on a wish that our enemies will be smited, cast out, and punished for what they did to us by some superior, paternalistic power. Democracy and mediation require a different, collaborative, non-zero sum, interest-based approach. This session will examine a few of the sources of magic in mediation and the transformational skills and transcendent techniques that allow us to move beyond conciliation and compromise to collaboration and consensus, and beyond settlement to resolution, forgiveness, reconciliation, and prevention.

Kenneth Cloke

Kenneth Cloke is Director of the Center for Dispute Resolution and a mediator, arbitrator, facilitator, coach, consultant, and trainer. He specializes in communication, negotiation, and resolving complex multi-party disputes, including marital, divorce, family, community, grievance and workplace disputes, collective bargaining negotiations, organizational and school conflicts, sexual harassment, discrimination, and public policy disputes; and designing preventative conflict resolution systems.    Kenneth’s facilitation, coaching, consulting, and training practice includes work with leaders of public, private, and non-profit organizations on effective communications, dialogue, collaborative negotiation, relationship and team building, conflict resolution, leadership development, strategic planning, designing systems, culture and organizational change.   Kenneth served as an Administrative Law Judge for the California Agricultural Labor Relations Board and the Public Employment Relations Board, a Factfinder for the Public Employment Relations Board, and a Judge Pro Tem for the Superior Court of Los Angeles. He has been an Arbitrator and Mediator for over forty years in labor management disputes, and is a member of a number of arbitration panels.    Kenneth’s university teaching includes mediation, law, history, political science, conflict studies, urban studies, and other topics at several colleges and universities. He is or has recently been an Adjunct Professor at Pepperdine University School of Law; Southern Methodist University; University of Southern California, Global Negotiation Insight Institute at Harvard Law School; Omega Institute; Albert Einstein College of Medicine, Cape Cod Institute; University of Amsterdam ADR Institute; Saybrook University; Massey University (New Zealand).    Kenneth is co-founder and first President of Mediators Beyond Borders. He has done conflict resolution work in Armenia, Australia, Austria, Bahamas, Brazil, Canada, China, Cuba, Denmark, England, Georgia, Greece, India, Ireland, Japan, Mexico, Netherlands, New Zealand, Nicaragua, Pakistan, Puerto Rico, Scotland, Slovenia, Spain, Switzerland, Thailand, Turkey, Ukraine, USSR, and Zimbabwe.

Workshop Tickets

You will receive the Zoom Meeting information via a separate email after your registration and payment.

$65- CB Member $85- General Public

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Event Sponsorships Please consider becoming a sponsor for our 2023 San Francisco Peacemaker Awards: The Future of Peace. Your sponsorship honors those working to prevent and reduce conflict throughout San Francisco. It will provide critical funds to support for our Neighborhood Mediation Program and help us expand our Restorative Justice Program services. Sponsors receive workshop tickets.

Contact: Darlene Weide, MPH, MSW, Executive Director dweide@communityboards.org